Goodbye Blue!

He was a great house-guest, that Blue.  (Wait... I'm assuming it was "he" that was a great house-guest, is it possible it was "she?"  We may never know.)  He came to stay with us last week.  He was jiggled and sloshed and bounced across the street and into our home. 

He was possibly the most unassuming house guest we have ever had.  He never made a peep, nor requested something that we couldn't give him.  He didn't mind when we weren't around.  He was as gracious a guest as one could be, seemed to be content with his guestroom (a.k.a. our bathroom counter) and even shared the space with us.

He didn't cause any trouble (except a few minor panic-attacks to mom when she thought that the big boy may have gotten into the guestroom and opted to "hold" the guest... whew!-- didn't really ever happen.)  And another small panic attack when mom heard from the little boy that the fish "accidentally" got too much food.  Needless to say, we are so glad that Blue stayed alive for us the entire weekend (thank you, Blue!) 

Tonight he will get sloshed and jiggled and bounced back across the street to his real home.  He will be happy to back in familiar surroundings I am sure.  (... Or maybe "she" will be happy!)

Come again, Blue!  We'd be more than happy to have you.

Parenthood: An Endless Pop Quiz!

  

    Mom, how many atoms do you think there are in this room?  Are there google-plex atoms in the world?  What do you think mom?  Would you rather fall into a bottomless pit or jump with a bare belly onto a pile of fire-ants??  When will we be having dinner?  Can I have more chocolate chips?  Do bumblebees sting?  Have you seen where hornets have been going in the hole in the house?  Can I show you Mom?  Do you want to try my chalk maze?  Do you? Do you, Mom?   Do worms have brains?  Would you rather die of being freezing cold or of burning up from being too hot?  Mom, do mosquitos do anything good?  Why did God make things that don't do anything good?  Can we sing the song I liked?  Why do you say "mystery" mom?... when it's "pymestry"... everyone sings "pymestry."  Do you want to play this game? Do you like this game?  Do you really like search and find games mom?  What are dust mites? Do they bite?  Is this a bite from a dust mite?  Could it be from a spider?  Do you think I'm lactose intollerant?  Mom?  Can you look at this? 

Do you think we could build a fire tonight?  Can we do it sometime this week?  Can we have someone over?  Why are there bad words?  Is hell a bad word?  When we are in heaven, what age will we be?  Will we be old age (because I'd like to be like 33.)  How much money did this car cost?  How much money do you have mom?  Can we do something fun right now?  Dad?  Can you help me?  Can we get another dog?  Why do we have to wait? 

      And...this is why, when I sneak into the peaceful, dark, quiet bedroom each night, and peak up over the bunk bed and see a little boy resting his little head on his pillow and dreaming away in silence... I smile and go to rest my head on my pillow too.  Tomorrow will be full of many questions that I surely can't be prepared for!

    

Eleven Years

Exactly 11 years ago today, we had the privilege of accepting a very special gift into our lives. This gift arrived--tiny, fragile, and precious. There were no bows or ribbons tied on this gift, there were no cards attached-- this gift was a baby boy born to us. Although our hearts were big and our eyes were wide with amazement when we first laid eyes on our bundle, we couldn't have comprehended in that instant what depth of meaning, what breadth of gratitude, what width of life experience, nor length of love our hearts would grow to hold. Words are not adequate, nor do justice to the way this gift would change our lives, turn us upside-down, revolutionize every ideal we professed to hold, and truly make us different people.

If a tag or card had been attached to this most precious gift, I wonder what it might have read... maybe something like this: To you~ From God~ Though you do not know it now, you will come to see that you hold in your arms, a life, most dear to Me. He's a special boy who will not do all the things the world expects. He won't say his ABCs and times tables, nor will he run the fastest in his class. He won't win the trophy for every sport or even throw a ball. He won't be the envy of every perfect family. He'll struggle to do some of the most basic life skills. He will rely on you for everything and you will be unsure of yourselves as you help him through the growing process. Do not be afraid, because I haven't given you this precious child in error. He is on loan to you, to care for, guide and love. He will open your eyes to how special life is, he will cause you to question and ponder and ultimately secure your faith in Me. His heart is loving and he'll love you unconditionally. He won't judge others for what they wear or how they talk. He'll enjoy the simple things in life. He'll wake up every day smiling from ear to ear simply because he's happy to see you. When you think things are too difficult, he'll make you laugh. When you think life is too complicated, he'll ask you to sit with him and just enjoy the moment. Those moments will be like no other and you won't want to trade them for anything in the world. Trust Me.

This gift I write of is our oldest son, Nathan. He was born with a rare condition called Angelman Syndrome. He is truly a special gift and blessing to us. His belly laugh is contagious, his two-ton-bear-hug and full-body-tackle-until-you-roll-backward onto the floor, is unmatched, and the perseverance to attain what he sets his sights on is amazing to say the least. He is 11 years old today, April 8th!! Happy Birthday big boy!

No Time Like the Present

This post dedicated to Leo

There is nothing quite like experiencing loss. It comes in many forms... loss of a job, loss of an opportunity, loss of a loved one. It may seem a depressing topic, but most of us can share of specific times we have lost something or someone in our lives and when we do, we realize that the loss is as much a part of life as the moments we have gained something or someone. I begin my blog with this topic, because it is through a recent loss that I am inspired to birth a blog that I always thought I'd do "someday." It's that "someday"... that vague, ominous, looming, in-the-distance, down-the-road "someday" that cheats us from "today."

It was about two weeks ago, on a Saturday night, I went to let our family dog into the house from the backyard. When I came to the door, something already seemed wrong. Leo, our Golden Retriever, always stood at the sliding backdoor waiting for a compassionate person to let him back inside. He wasn't there. I called his name into the darkness of the yard. He didn't come. We looked around, called his name again, and eventually discovered a side gate unlatched. He had gone exploring in the neighborhood. To bring you to the startling end of a story, we found our beloved dog up on the side of a road nearby-- he had been hit by a car and was gone. It is still as shocking to write this here as it was to find him that night. It was that instant, that moment, that blink of an eye that he was with us and then gone. I couldn't say that I'd pat his head "tomorrow", tell him he was good dog "next week", or take him for a walk "when I got the time." Those opportunities were gone, those moments were gone, he was gone.

As I passed through the next week, I began to assimilate what had happened. Our brains and our hearts don't process loss so easily. We have to live it for awhile to grasp it's finality and it's meaning. I considered my life, my hopes, my goals and my time. I remembered a quote I had recently seen: "The way we spend our days is the way we spend our life." Without living in a panic of what we should or could be doing, we can still live in the reality of our gift of today. It's what we choose to do now, while we have this day we call "today."

Thus the reason I decided to start this blog right here and now. I figured I'd do it sometime... when I thought of a good title, when I had enough time, when I was brave enough to share stories with others, and when I just plain old got around to it. Well, I've decided not to wait until I get around to it... I'm going to "get around to it today!"